


Apartment 13B

by slashyrogue



Series: Chicken Strips [1]
Category: Basic Instinct (Movies), Mænd & høns | Men & Chicken (2015)
Genre: Falling In Love, Fluff, M/M, Neighbors
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-06-18
Updated: 2018-06-18
Packaged: 2019-05-25 03:36:36
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,887
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14968268
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/slashyrogue/pseuds/slashyrogue
Summary: Adam assumed he'd go through life without ever having said I love you to anyone until one day in early Summer when his life literally blew up in his face. Or Adam stays with his friend Stella and develops an strange obsession with the man in 13B that turns into much, much more.





	Apartment 13B

**Author's Note:**

> A while back I wrote a series of fics based on Adam and Elias's relationship that I've never put here. This is how they met. Enjoy.

 

 

The words, "I love you," had never been in Adam's vocabulary.

 

"I want to fuck you," yes.

 

He used those words more than his own name, but really he had no use for the L word.

 

He supposed it had to do with growing up with a shit mother and absentee father but really those were just excuses.

 

Adam didn't have use for the L word because why the fuck would he need it?

 

He assumed he'd go through life without ever having said it to anyone until one day in early Summer when his life literally blew up in his face.

 

The minute he'd walked up to his flat and seen the flames coming from the building he'd cursed.

 

Faulty wiring, they said.

 

Can't be fixed, they said.

 

Adam lost half his things and had no fucking place to live but thank god for renter's insurance. The check was a nice distraction but again he had nowhere to spend his nights.

 

Which meant he would need to stay with his friend Stella. 

 

Stella lived in the type of building Adam wouldn't normally be caught dead in but really since he had no other friends willing to put up with him for very long there was nothing to be done.

 

She worked last shift and slept all morning so over the next several weeks while Adam worked from home he grew quite bored easily.

 

The search for a home wasn't much of a distraction so he decided to look for one.

 

Though to his surprise one found him.

 

13B.

 

13B was quite possibly the ugliest man Adam had never laid eyes on.

 

He dressed and groomed about four decades behind the rest of the world, his upper lip disfigured, and he had no eyebrows. Adam grew almost obsessed with 13B over the course of his stay in Stella's flat to an insane degree.

 

13B always washed his clothes on a Friday so Adam would bring clothes on Fridays just to see what the man would do. He'd try to talk and flirt with him, but 13B ignored every single advance Adam made.

 

13B took the lift only on odd days of the week so Adam did the same, observing the reactions he got in various types of clothes. He thought for certain that the man had a raging erection every time they'd met but couldn't be sure so he would stand awkwardly close just to try to feel.

 

After his second week in the building there was a note on Stella's door.

 

Tell your friend I am not a homosexual.

 

Stella laughed for a good hour at the note and told Adam to get a life.

 

Which he did for the following week in between seeing more flats. None of them were good enough of course but he got an assignment to follow the Mayor's assistant so he was too busy to worry about 13B.

 

His assignment turned into a scandal, which Adam loved and adored causing. He was so into the chaos that he hardly noticed the man who passed him by in the hallway though the smell made him look up.

 

"Holy Christ," he whispered, turning his head.

 

13B had gotten his hair done and shaved off his horrid mustache.

 

He'd exposed his lip but Adam didn't give a shit about that.

 

13B was fucking gorgeous.

 

He turned around so fast he nearly fell over the railing, grabbing the thing and staring at 13B's behind.

 

Adam ran into Stella's flat, tossed down his keys, and yelled out.

 

"Stella!"

 

His friend ran into the room. 

 

"What is it, what's happened?"

 

"He's a fucking supermodel!"

 

Stella blinked. "Who?"

 

"13 bloody B! Have you seen him? He got his hair done and was even wearing decent clothes! He must be getting shagged on the regular or something. I...oh hell I missed out on that!?"

 

She rolled her eyes and walked back into her bedroom.

 

Adam pulled out the listings to search for his forever home while imagining what 13B's face would look like between his knees.

 

He got another assignment the following day that ended up lasting another week.

 

Adam kept washing his things on Fridays but 13B no longer did.

 

In fact he hardly saw the man at all for the rest of the month even when he  walked outside his flat waiting.

 

When the flat beside that one opened up Stella practically pushed him into renting.

 

"I don't want to live here, this place is..."

 

"You've been here for almost two months, Poppet. I love you to pieces but one more day with you obsessing over Elias..."

 

Adam blinked. "You know his name?"

 

"If you'd paid any attention, Darling, you would've known it too. It's written on his door."

 

He raised his eyebrow. "I don't think so."

 

"It is, but you're changing the conversation. The place is not very expensive and is right next door to the straight male you're attempting to fuck. I think this is a sign from on high."

 

Adam couldn't disagree with that logic.

 

He moved in over the following week and caught a few glimpses of Elias but not many. None of them included a female or male companion.

 

Adam had a flurry of assignments over the next few months.

 

A cheating senator.

 

Wealthy businesswoman in the midst of divorce.

 

Death of a once child starlet.

 

Murderous husbands on the run.

 

He hardly spent time at home and almost forgot Elias entirely. Till one morning he left his flat and banged right into him.

 

They both fell and Adam dropped his bag while Elias's pile of books scattered.

 

"Watch where you're going!"

 

He blinked as he took in the man's appearance.

 

"Oh, it grew back."

 

Elias looked at him.

 

His hair was getting curly again, and the mustache just too long now to be fashionable.

 

"I like it better this way."

 

Adam frowned. "I thought you looked bloody gorgeous the other way but hell it's your face. Do what you want with it."

 

He picked up two of Elias's books and smiled at him.

 

"What is your name?"

 

"Adam Towers."

 

"I've seen you in the newspaper. You're a horrible man."

 

Adam laughed. "This is not the first time someone's told me that, luv. Good day to you."

 

He got home late that night and found a note on his door.

 

YOUR HAIR IS TOO LONG. 

 

Adam grinned and walked into his flat to find a pen. He wrote on the back and stuck it on Elias's door.

 

SHAVE YOUR MUSTACHE. 

 

He went to bed that night with a smile on his face and woke to another note. 

 

YOU ONLY WISH YOU COULD GROW A MUSTACHE THIS MANLY. 

 

Adam set the note down on his kitchen counter and went into the bathroom to ready himself for the day. He had no assignments currently which again led him into distractions that could only mean trouble. 

 

He opened the medicine cabinet to get his toothbrush and paused at the sight of his razor. 

 

The pause was enough to make him pick the razor up, lather his face, and shave off every piece of hair. 

 

Being without facial hair made Adam look about ten years younger. 

 

He smiled and brushed his teeth. 

 

The note he put on Elias’s door when he went out that morning for coffee said only four words. 

 

I SHAVED.

 

YOUR TURN. 

 

Adam went to the coffee shop that morning and got a free drink from the cute barista behind the counter. He also got a very sloppy blowjob later on that afternoon from that same barista and was mistaken for celebrity on his walk back home. 

 

Elias had left a note for him in dark black marker when he returned, a stark contrast to the faded grey door it was hung on. 

  
  


Adam pulled out a pen when he got inside his place and wrote one word.  

 

CHICKEN. 

 

He went to tape the note to Elias’s door and was surprised when it opened. 

 

The man seemed shocked at the state of his face and didn’t speak for half a second. 

 

“You look very young.” 

 

Adam handed him the note. “Now you know I’m not lying.” 

 

Elias looked at the note and his incredulous glare was almost cute. 

 

“I am not a chicken!” 

 

Adam reached out to touch his upper lip and delighted in how he seemed to freeze. 

 

“You are, luv. A very furry one to be sure but a chicken nonetheless.” 

 

Elias pushed him back and closed the door in his face. 

 

Adam frowned, standing outside for another moment before he headed home again. 

 

There were no more notes after that. 

 

Adam tried to tell himself he didn’t need the distraction when a mountain of assignments came his way not soon after. Mostly follow-ups to the stories he’d written a week prior but they were well sourced for once and didn’t leave him with mounting defamation lawsuits. 

 

The week after the chicken incident he was walking back from the train when a window display caught his eye. It was a barnyard scene complete with all the animals you’d expect, and right smack in the middle of it all was a very furry chicken. 

 

He bought the toy despite the price being higher than any stuffed toy should be and left it outside Elias’s flat with a note. 

 

I HOPE YOU WILL EGG-CEPT MY APOLOGY. 

 

Adam showered and shaved again as the new look had brought him nothing but good things and he planned on keeping them. He picked up his cell in a very short towel ready to call for takeaway when there was a knock at his door. 

 

He opened up to Elias, sans mustache, looking awkward and focused very much on his bare chest. 

 

“I accept your apology,” he said, trying to keep his eyes at Adam’s but failing miserably. 

 

Adam grinned and let his towel slip just a bit. He had no idea what drew him to this man but fuck if he thought he was ugly anymore. “Thank you.” 

 

“I will leave you to dress.” 

 

Elias turned to go and Adam called out. 

 

“Want to stay for dinner? I was about to order in.” 

 

The smile he got in return made his stomach flutter. “Yes, I’d like that.” 

 

They spent the rest of the night sharing Chinese food, laughing and genuinely having a good time. 

 

Adam couldn’t remember having this good a time on a date without fucking being included. 

 

“You know,” he said, chewing on a pot sticker, “for a man who once said he was not a homosexual you sure spent an awful long time staring at my chest earlier.” 

 

Elias blushed and took a long sip of his coke. He set down the can and let out a long breath. “I may not be attracted to most men,” he said before he looked at Adam again, “But I am attracted to you.” 

 

Adam grinned. “Lucky me then, Curly, especially now that you shaved off that horrid mustache.” 

 

“I looked very nice with that facial hair you’re just--” 

 

He shut Elias up with a kiss, which turned into an awkward hour of heavy petting that ended with Elias cumming in his chinos while Adam was left unfulfilled. 

 

“I…” 

 

Adam held him down and kissed the top of his lip. “Nothing to be embarrassed about, luv. I think it’s sexy how excited you are.” 

 

Elias had tears in his eyes. “I have a condition,” he whispered, “It...I am quite sensitive. It...it’s hard to…” 

 

Adam opened the front of his pants and stroked Elias’s cock with a teasing slowness. 

 

“You’re always down to fuck, then?” 

 

“Yes,” Elias moaned, bucking up into his hand, “I…” 

 

“Oh darling you’ve found the perfect person to help you with that particular malady.” 

 

Thus began the most sex filled month of Adam’s life. 

 

There was nowhere that Elias wouldn’t be down to fuck it seemed. 

 

They had sex in: 

 

The backrow seats in a movie theater, behind the dumpster at a fast food restaurant, a coffee shop bathroom, a ferris wheel,  the changing room at a very expensive designer store, a restaurant kitchen, several different lifts all over the city, and his editor’s desk at the newspaper. 

 

Adam was sore all over, lost fifteen pounds, and had never been happier. 

 

Which was of course why everything had to go to shit. 

 

There was a gala being held by and honoring the most influential people in all of London called SWANK. He hadn’t ever been included before which was a high honor and something made him not tell Elias. He lied about where he’d be, spent the whole night feeling like shit and pretending to smile, and came home to find Elias asleep on his couch. 

 

They’d jerked each other off while Adam lied again saying he’d been forced to go to a very long meeting, and when he woke up the next morning to the newspaper on his bed the bottom dropped out of his chest. 

 

There was a picture on the front page with him kissing some cow pop singer under the headline: HIGH FUN AT THE SWANK GALA

 

He cursed and ran out into the other room only to find no sign of Elias except for the remains of a spilled cup of coffee. 

 

Adam threw open his door and found a note tapped on the other side. 

 

LIAR LIAR 

 

He walked next door and pounded till his wrists ached but Elias wouldn’t pick up. 

 

Stella came over after Adam called her, surprised to see how horrible he looked. 

 

“Shit, you’ve dodged me for weeks now and I come to see you in tatters?” 

 

“I...I was afraid to bring him around those swank fucks, Shell. I...fuck I missed him all night and I shouldn’t give two flying bloody fucks but I did and now…” 

 

Stella hugged him tight. “Dear god, poppet. I think you’re in love.” 

 

Adam laughed. “No, I...fuck I don’t fall in love Stell.” 

 

“Too late, Addie. I think you have.” 

 

Elias didn’t talk to him for the next several weeks no matter if Adam got in front of him or not. His hair got even curlier and his mustache started to grow in again but Adam still wanted to fuck him blind. 

 

So he started to write notes again. 

 

They were longer notes, oddly about his own past, and he would put each one under 13B’s door every night. He did this for another week but got nothing in return. 

 

He decided on one more straight and to the point. 

 

P.S. I NEVER TOLD YOU BUT I WAS FALLING IN LOVE. 

 

This one he taped right over the numbers.

 

When he went to bed that night he thought about how long it had been since he’d had sex with anyone and realized he didn’t give two shits. 

 

He just wanted Elias. 

 

Adam woke up feeling like shit and didn’t even bother going to the door because he knew there was little point. He had breakfast, worked on his obligatory hour of writing about the Prince’s new baby, and nearly turned to go back to bed when something stopped him. 

 

He unlocked the door and found the stuffed chicken sitting on the floor right outside. 

 

Adam had tears in his eyes when he bent down to pick it up, surprised to find a note on its ass. 

 

I LOVE YOU TOO. 

 

He tossed it down and ran to Elias’s door only for it to open without the slightest touch. 

 

Elias’s face was red and his eyes were swollen from crying but Adam had never wanted to kiss him more. 

 

“I’m a fucking asshole,” he said, “You are cordially invited to every shitty party I get asked to from now on no matter who’s there.” 

 

Elias frowned. “Are you ashamed of me?” 

 

“No,” Adam said, shaking his head, “Never. You want me to prove it?” 

 

“Yes.” 

 

Adam grabbed his hand and pulled Elias back to his flat. They sat on the couch and he picked up his laptop, positioning it so they’d be clearly seen. 

 

“What are you doing?” 

 

“We’re making a sex video and I’m going to upload it to the internet.” 

 

“People won’t care who you’re…” 

 

Adam made Elias look at him before he kissed him and when they parted he smiled. 

 

“They’ll care.” 

 

The next morning Adam was fired from his job at The Sun. 

 

The very next afternoon he got hired for the Celebrity Scandals section of The Hot Spot, the sleaziest scam rag in town. He of course, said yes. 

 

A month later he moved into 13B. 

 

The stuffed chicken, of course, stayed right in the middle of their kitchen table where every morning Adam would check on the stats of their sex video. 

 

Currently the viewing number was at 2,456,344 views. 

 

“Let’s get the next one to three,” he whispered to Elias one night, sweaty and sated while his eyes got heavy. 

 

“Okay,” Elias mumbled, “But I get to be on top this time.” 

 

“And miss the glorious shot of your cock? No fucking way, luv. I know what the people want.” 

 

Elias blushed and kissed his forehead. “Everybody wants me?” 

 

“Oh you’re bloody right they do. But I am the only one who can have you.” 

 

Elias made no argument against that. 

  
  



End file.
